Letter 1 – The Question.
The norm is to go into the retrospective mode and reminisce the various possibilities that could have been. Walking down the memory lanes and wishfully thinking – Oh I could have been there, done that. Often bordering on the blurred lines of regret, we all find ourselves at one time or the other, where we have this thought – I should have done this instead of that; and so on.
Why is it a normal human behaviour to just keep walking back to the past? Why is it so difficult to look ahead and decide at this moment and think – “Look, all said and done, how about keeping the past aside after learning what it has to give; and move on?”
Taking the advantage of being at this position where i might easily rubbish the thought of living in the past invariably, I confess I also end up doing this very same thing N number of times in a day. Situations at home – Oh I could have explained it this way, done that specific thing that way. Must have been more careful, Why was I not careful in the first place! Random conversations with different people, at work or at home – why did I start this at all? Was this even necessary to pay so much of your time and attention to certain categories of people?
More often than not, we end up doing things we would actually not like when thinking about in the future. Yet, what’s the way out?
A bugging question with a very elusive answer – Why do we not do what we actually want to do? Why not be who we actually are or want to be?
A sudden thought process has started this conversation, which got me thinking seriously about the time lost in being what I am actually not and how to correct this fundamentally wrong thing I have been and am doing to myself. Jotting down an outline of how I would like to shape the future would perhaps help.
In the hope of getting this straight by writing all the things down, let’s see where does this take me down the line. 🙂